Operation American Spring Approaches

Well, Obama has only two more days as President, before he is dragged from the White House and placed on trial for treason in front of Ted Cruz and Allen West.   The organizers of Operation American Spring, called for Washington this Friday, are now predicting between 10 and 30 million people to show up, to force Obama from office, strictly, as the organizers tell us, in accord with the U.S. Constitution.  Once again, they are apparently referring to the parts of the Constitution written in invisible ink that only wingnuts can read, as I don't remember the part of the Constitution that provides for this method of changing leaders.

Here's a little bit of the thinking of one of the leaders of this event, a Colonel Riley.  Just to make it clear, I don't have a clue who Mort is:

"Mort: Your hoping 10 million people will show up for OAS, isn’t that kind of high?

Col. Riley: In less than 30 days of the call for the massive “movement to action” in Washington, D.C., nearly every State in America, every political persuasion, rich, poor, every color, all ages, men, women,  liberal, conservative, independent, unemployed, et al are now mobilizing to participate in this peaceful, non-violent, cause in the search for constitutional restoration for America. We have well over 1 million militia members mobilizing; bikers, truckers, hunters, Tea Party groups….citizens across America. No, I don’t think 10 million is high at all…"

Don't put any money on it, bucko.  For a sense of the likely scale of this event, the SPLC estimates the current total militia membership in the country as about 22,000.

"Mort: OAS will be using civil disobedience in the hopes of shutting down D.C., why hasn’t anyone else thought of this?

Col. Riley:  God has made a way for freedom and liberty loving Americans to answer the call in defense of our nation."

Why, we ask, has no one ever thought of mass civil disobedience in Washington as a form of protest?
 Apparently, God waited until this very weekend to place this idea in the mind of his faithful followers.

Any way, I suspect this is a little more what these guys have in mind:


"Barack Obama is a fraud. Never before have we faced any enemy that has  resembled a slow growing, but deadly cancer creeping throughout America represented by betrayers, deceivers, political operatives, that have no allegiance to the United States.

It is unclear how this will all unravel but we are calling for the removal of Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Harry Reid, Mitch McConnell, John Boehner, Nancy Pelosi, and Eric Holder as a start toward constitutional restoration."
Restoring the Constitution by destroying it,  What a brilliant idea, which could have only occurred to the minds of Patriots!

I was thinking of going to Washington for this historical event, but given that it isn't receiving a shred of the support from the likes of Fox News and the major right wing blogs that previous marches to cast out Obama have had, and thunderstorms are predicted for all day Friday in Washington (apparently God wasn't behind this event enough to take care of the weather,) so somehow I suspect that the turnout will fall a little short of 30 million.  What do you think?  I can hardly wait to find out how many PATRIOTS!!!!!!!! there really are in our country.  I wonder if there will be more than the 130 that showed up for the last time Obama was thrown out of the White House, in November of 2013.

Needless to say, want it or not, you are going to hear from Green Eagle what happens.

Comments

Poll P. said…
Sorry the weather is uncooperative. You would have had fun.
Marc said…
Isn't this the anniversary for 'Dr. Strangelove'?
Magpie said…
As sure as I am that Colonel Riley and co have thought this through, I’d like to point out something regarding the 10 million scenario.

The population of DC would be around the 650,000 mark, so a sudden influx of 10 million people would overwhelm its amenities.
Let me put some numbers around what just one aspect of that means… bearing in mind this is the lowest end of their expected range of participants:

Assuming they limit themselves to just 6 minutes in the toilet per 24 hours (which is pretty good self-control ) you still have an average 41,667 people going to the toilet simultaneously for the duration of the operation, over and above the residents. Public toilets are going to block up pretty quick. Of course the good people of Washington DC may be so kind as to have thousands of halfwit Right wing idiots lining up to use their home toilets, but I would not bank on that.

So let’s say they fill that need out with portable toilets, like on construction sites, that’s still not allowing any time for those toilets to even be emptied out… which would really have to occur on the hour, at least, otherwise they’d overflow. If that did occur on the hour and it also only took 3 minutes each time (both allowances are extremely optimistic) - that’s 72 minutes of downtime per toilet over a 24 hour period, for which you’d have to compensate with 2,193 more units bringing the total to 43,860 toilets, none of which will be idle for a second. Each day 7518 volunteers working 8 hour shifts each (allowing for an hour total in breaks) - to strict rotation - to clean them.

The amount of water required would probably make you pray for a thunderstorm. This is also allowing for zero malfunction, breakage or… ahem… blockage, so I might actually be understating it. Let’s say hotels, eating places, malls, schools… etc take up that gap.

You could not have that many toilets near the principle protest group. For one thing there’d be space issues, the worst smell in the world, and choke points of ingress and egress around them that would mean they’d probably spend all their time including sleep time in a queue for the loo, crossing their legs, wincing and thinking of the constitution. So the toilets would have to be distributed all over the city – about one for every 14 regular inhabitants, in parks, front lawns, car parks.

This allows for no gender divide because as I said no toilet could be idle for a second. I recommend they go light on the curry before heading to DC.

They could of course just shit all over the place. In any advent, the breakdown of waste disposal would probably cause public illness on a scale that alone could threaten continuity of government.
But like I said I’m sure Colonel Riley has thought of all this, so maybe that’s actually the plan.

A final aside on what 30 million instead of 10 million would mean… That’s 3 times all of the above, 46 times the population of the city, and over 7 million more people than live on the continent of Australia.
Green Eagle said…
Thank you so much for your careful scholarship, Magpie, but none of this would happen here, because of PATRIOTISM!!! In AMERICA, their physical feces will disappear just like their intellectual feces does, and no one will remember a thing.

And by the way, BENGHAZI!!!
Grung_e_Gene said…
They won't get 1000 but the Right-Wing blog-o-sphere of incestuous amplification will attempt to turn it into a rousing thing.

And the Corporate Media which can't be bothered to cover the Moral Monday marches in North Carolina and downplayed the Anti-War Marches in 2003 will pick up the right-wing agitation and move it along

Somberly discussing how divisive President Obama is
Shaw Kenawe said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shaw Kenawe said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shaw Kenawe said…
Well they've got one there, anyway.

(Blogger was acting weird this AM.)
Paul Avery said…
Poop In Your Pants For Freedom
Only the faint-hearted use Depends.

Magpie's extensive research doesn't take into account is that this is American Spring poop--and everyone knows God made their shit is red, white and blue, which is odorless.
God will also make 10 million people magically spring forth from an organization which claims no more than 6000 members on its facebook page.

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